Still Here, Still Watching

City wakes slowly outside my window.
Rain falls on pavement I've crossed a thousand times.

Droplets blur the glass.
Reflections blur me too.

Time passes quietly whether I let it or not.
Seasons change colors without asking permission.

The room rearranges itself around my grief.
Memories linger the way smoke does, long after the fire.

Shadows on walls remind me I still cast one.
Sunlight filters in like it has somewhere to be.

Dust motes dance in the beam and I let them.
Slowly I breathe, one full breath, then another.

The inward lens focuses on what's still standing.
This moment.

This window.
This light that came anyway.

Calmness settles like fog on streets I used to walk with someone.
Quietly I observe the world waking without him.

Gently I let go of what's past.
Softly I begin again, not healed, just here.

--Vera